The Art of Starting Over
As long as there’s life there’s hope…
Maybe you're facing unemployment, divorce, illness, or the loss of a loved one. Maybe you've lost your home and all of your possessions due to a massive storm or raging wildfire. Maybe you're devastated over a failed business or career path.
Sometimes life can be so overwhelming, it can leave you breathless.
In light of all the twists and turns the world has experienced over the last few years, I think we are all feeling some degree of loss, burden, and despair.
You are definitely not alone. Believe me.
There were quite a few times in my life when things seemed to fall apart for me. The last four years have been especially challenging. And with the loss of my younger sister to cancer last October, I struggled to find a way out of crippling darkness.
After so much pain and loss, how does one pick up the pieces and begin again?
When I decided to pour my heart out to God to save me from the pattern of confusion and brokenness, that’s when my life began to blossom. Meditating on God's promises in the Holy Scriptures was a reminder that the creator of the universe was by my side. And always will be.
Today, I’m still here, and thriving despite my losses. And I’m confident that you will be, too.
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. ”
Yes, I think it's important to allow yourself some time to grieve, embrace, and acknowledge the changes that have occurred, but avoid lingering in this place for too long. Time is passing quickly. There is nothing you can do about the past, but you can definitely decide to walk toward the future.
Begin to open your heart and your mind to new possibilities. It took me some time to heal and open my heart to life again, but the process was so worth it. Trust me, there is LIFE at the end of the tunnel!
So, after so much pain and loss, where do you go from here?
Here are a few lessons I’ve learned through my own journey of loss and healing:
1. Begin your new journey with prayer.
Despite our best efforts, sometimes life falls apart, and when you have tried everything to no avail, seek the guidance of our heavenly Father, who loves and cares for you deeply.
When you seek God’s help, there is no need for elaborate prayers, settings, or rituals. Simply, pour out your heart before Him. Tell Him everything. Share your pain, anger, fear, and doubts, in your own words. Ask Him for healing and the strength to move forward. Ask for His wisdom and direction for this new journey.
You don’t have to figure out how to get out of the dark on your own. Let God guide your next steps. He is always waiting for you with open arms.
“Cast all your care upon Him because He cares for you”
2. Forgive.
There are times in life when things happen beyond our control. Sometimes, someone else’s choices negatively impact on us. But, sometimes, life falls apart as a result of our own choices.
If this is the case, forgive yourself for any missteps or less-than-ideal choices you may have made along the way. Ask our Father to forgive you as well. Forgive others that may have hurt you. We are human, we don't always get things right.
From personal experience, forgiveness can be very difficult, but it's a necessary step toward wholeness. If you are having a difficult time forgiving yourself or others, ask our Father for the strength, courage, and will to forgive.
Unforgiveness on any level separates you from God, stalls your blessings, and your life will become stagnant. Beginning your new journey with a clean heart will enable love and blessings to pour into your life again.
“Bear with each other and forgive one another, if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”
3. Take inventory of the lessons you've learned.
There’s no doubt you’ve learned a great deal about yourself, about others, and the world around you through your pain and struggles. This is a good thing!
Now, you’re more prepared to tackle and conquer any future challenges. Your experiences also place you in a unique position to assist others on their journeys.
Even while you are healing, seek out other wounded souls that may need a word of love and encouragement. In helping others, you may get the help you need as well. There is a purpose in everything. There are no coincidences.
“Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.”
4. Realize you have a greater purpose on this earth.
Though at times it may seem like the world is conspiring against you, you are actually being prepared for something much bigger than yourself. A greater blessing, a promotion, a higher level. There is always a bigger picture, a deeper meaning to your struggle that remains hidden, to be revealed at the right time.
Our struggles also draw us closer to our Father, where we should be.
Sometimes in life, things don’t simply happen TO you, but FOR you. Your experiences, whether “good” or “bad” can be used for a greater good because you are a child of a greater God.
“For I know the plans I have for you”, says the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” ”
5. Gather advice and resources from others.
Don’t be afraid to reach out to trusted family or friends for support, direction, and guidance, specifically those who have been in similar situations.
Ask our heavenly Father to direct you to the right people and places for help. Your local place of worship or community outreach centers are also great places to get assistance if you need clothing, food, shelter, and/or other necessities.
Put aside any pride or fear in asking for help. Reaching out to others is one of the first steps to starting a new chapter in your life.
Remember, we ALL need help at one time or another.
“Where there is no guidance the people fall, but in an abundance of counselors there is victory.”
6. Begin your journey with gratitude.
Right now, it may seem like all is lost and you have little to be thankful for. But when you slow down and really take stock of your life, you'll find little blessings surrounding you. Make a list of these things, even if you only notice one or two blessings at first.
The more you practice gratitude, you'll begin to see your life unfold in beautiful ways. Pause and take a moment each day to reflect on all of the beauty that is still present in your life. Take note of all the wonderful people, places, and things in your life that still bring you joy at this moment. Realize that you are still here. And as long as there's life, there's hope.
Yes, look closely. God is present everywhere.
“Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. ”
7. Be gracious with yourself.
Your life will begin to fall into place when you mindfully decide to completely let go of the past and move forward. Your life may not change drastically overnight, but if you take life one step, one moment at a time, one day you will wake up and things WILL BE dramatically different.
Remember, when starting this new chapter, be kind to yourself. Be patient with yourself. Trust the process. More importantly, trust God. Continue in hope and prayer. Keep moving forward and one day you will find yourself in the middle of the promise.
When it seems like your life is falling apart, it may be actually falling into place.
A prayer for the journey ahead…
Heavenly Father,
Thank you for the opportunity to begin again.
You are the God who makes all things new. Help me to “forget the former things” and see the new thing You are doing in my life. (Isaiah 43:18-19)
Lord, reveal to me any unforgiveness and bitterness in my heart, and give me the strength, courage, and willingness to forgive others and myself.
Help me to let go of my past and step forward with open hands and an open heart, ready for what You have prepared for me.
Like Paul, I choose not to dwell on the past, but to press on toward the goal You have set before me. Remind me daily that I am a new creation in Christ - the old has gone, and the new has come. (Philippians 3:13-14, 2 Corinthians 5:17)
Give me endurance for the race You’ve marked out for me, letting go of every weight and sin that slows me down. Help me to keep my eyes fixed on You, looking straight ahead and turning neither to the right nor the left, but walking in the path that you light before me. (Hebrews 12:1, Proverbs 4: 25-27)
When my strength fails, remind me that those who hope in You will renew their strength, will soar on wings like eagles, will run and not grow weary, will walk and not faint. (Isaiah 40:31)
Lord, I rest in Your promises of guidance and protection. Bless me with wisdom, discernment and Your peace for the journey ahead.
I am assured that You will instruct me and teach me in the way I should go, that Your loving eye is always upon me. I lean not on my own understanding, but on You, trusting You with all my heart, acknowledging You in all my ways, confident that You will make my path straight. (Psalm 32:8, Proverbs 3:5-6)
So Lord, I am standing at the threshold of a new beginning. I surrender yesterday into Your hands, and I open today, and my future, to the leading of Your Holy Spirit.
Please walk with me into this new season, and may my steps always be rooted in You.
In Jesus’ name,
Amen.
“The Lord is good to those whose hope is in Him, to the one who seeks Him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.”
Are you on a journey to starting over?
What challenges are you facing today?
How can I pray for you?